Did someone say toast?

Google has long-since outstripped other search engines in its ability to help you find what you’re actually looking for; so monopolous is its ubiquity that it now goes some way to determining what you’re after.

Google Maps is revolutionary; Google Earth is chilling.

YouTube has steadily kept apace with advancing Internet technology.

Upload lengths get longer and longer; whole films are now available with one click.

They’re working to make more content from other suppliers available.

Video quality is now available in HD.

Untold statistics and specifics are becoming accessible.

You can annotate and caption your videos, even adding links to other content.

Enter Transcribe Audio.

OK, OK, maybe it’s not fair — it’s a great idea — to automatically generate captions from content through word recognition sophistry. It’d be incredible for the hard-of-hearing or deaf, and when it’s slick the future will indeed be here. It’ll cue motions toward impossibly infinite subtitling options, maybe remastering bad-quality original sound, and — GASP! — maybe even nuanced voiceovers for CGI animal films.

For the time being, however, YouTube’s installed its own lol machine.

Man, I love this thing. It makes me want to spend the whole day watching videos online. It makes me shun any videos that don’t have it enabled. It makes for edge-of-the-seat viewing — will they, won’t they stuff — will it be gibberish, will it accidentally be coherent (if irrelevant) — or, best of all, will it be entirely inappropriate?

Transcribe Audio has a weirdly sophisticated and technical vocabulary, often getting it almost right then going off topic completely.

In the odd recognizable word or word-half is the germ of our Utopian future — or, as Transcribe Audio might say, the Germany your toes in furniture.

But you don’t have to be born in 1984 to realize we’ve got a good thing going.

It’s hard in a still image to capture that chasm between what’s said and what may (or often may not) pop up. I tend to keep to those scarce moments when the real words spoken appear on screen, so the reference is self-inclusive. But I think we’re agreed, our Super All-Time Favourite is this moment, in G1 Transformers, when our friends the Autobots are attacked at a dam — the action moves under water and, without any dialogue, we’re swamped by scoring and the sound of the current.

Then, the rocks rub against one another.

Utopia.

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2 Responses to Did someone say toast?

  1. Pingback: They Appear Mechanical in Nature: The Battle L.A. Trailer | enterthesnowman

  2. Pingback: tights | enterthesnowman

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